May 8, 2011

Generations






Top: Grandmother Mary Belle Harrington wither her son Charles and her Daughter Madge, 1908. Below: My mother Madge and I on Easter 1951.
>My mother and I on Easter 1951.

Yesterday and Today
Himself: Was dashing and heroic and beyond his usual self. Not only did he do all the things he was supposed to do like change the oil in the Toyota, rotate the tires, work at the museum, salvage a game table and donate it to the cancer society, he went estate sailing and bought a rug. It’s 10x14 vs the one we have now which is 8x12. It’s blue vs red.

Herself: I moved living room furniture when I got home. One slice of pizza for dinner…..oooooo, it was so good. Still voiceless.

My mother started out a kind, hard working, over achiever, who was well loved. Marriage to a couple of losers plus colon cancer in 1948 started the middle of her life off on the wrong foot. She said to me once that she only wanted me to be independent in case she died. She didn’t die, she became an alcoholic.


Me with both kids on the porch of Number 20.

So I, of no self esteem and a strong inability to be independent, married and had two kids of my own before I became an alsoholic. I confess, I was a terrible mom loving inequally, drinking too much, and unable to enforce my own rules. I tried hard to do it right which didn’t work because I didn’t get clean and sober. Living “as if” doesn’t work if your kids can’t see the “as if.”


Here Lessa is with MJ in 2010.





Above: Beth, MJ, and Aaron. Below: Sally and her beloved Nutella. I don’t have permission to show a picture of Kay.


My eldest caught on to how to be a mother late, but she grasped the concept of “mom” at with great verve and desire to do it right. It takes a lot of work…even more with the new child rearing techniques. She’s doing marvelously well, and we are awfully proud of her. All the mom’s in our family are truly gifts from god.



Lenora knew just what to do with both her kids. We are forever blessed to have Dan and his family as a part of our family as well as the brilliant Mohave who got all straight A’s this year.


Mohave at David’s HS Graduation.


Think of all the other wonderful grandkids we inherited. We are so lucky.



Above: The Campo Family. Below: Dan and his Sister Lia.



Top down: Mage, Lessa, Lenora, and their brother Zee, 1986


Sometimes you do the best you can do with what you have available. What we have now are some wonderful mom’s in our family who do it right. Thank you all.

11 comments:

  1. You are a good, strong lady, my friend!!!!!!!!

    I've always said being a mom is the hardest job around. There's no training for it and damned few rewards. That said, it also can be the most rewarding. And yeah, all we can do is work with what we have and hope it turns out right!

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  2. There is no right or wrong way to be a mom; giving birth doesn't make us all alike. Furthermore, as we learn eventually, the kids aren't alike either. (Mine are all different, despite having the same parents.)

    You keep on trying, as you have, and you have a beautiful family to show for it.

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  3. You can take some credit for the results as your children grew into parents themselves. So how did the new rug turn out in the rearranged living room?

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  4. We all try to do the best we can with what we have and we are never perfect. Each child additionally is different needing a different set of parenting skills. All we can hope is that they forgive the mistakes and have it a little easier than we did!

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  5. Here for my Sunday visit, and what better day to catch up than Mother's Day! Like you, I can - and someday will - enumerate the challenges of the mother's of the family through the years. The most amazing miracle is that each generation has the opportunity and the heart to figure it our anew, to figure it out better. Love to you, and to all the lovely moms and children in your family. How very fortunate we all are!

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  6. Look at all the wonderful people who wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you. Some of us got less than able mothers and then became less than able parents ourselves. I will always be grateful to a counselor I found when my kids were a year and three years old. She mothered me and taught me how to turn my good intentions into some good parenting. Thank God for the help of others.

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  7. Thanks for the stroll down memory lane. I love your great granandma's hair. Dianne

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  8. We all do the best we can and when it works there is nothing more joyful.
    What a time you have had and what courage you have shown. You deserve to be surrounded by peace and love.
    Happy Mother's Day. Just for once you are behind us - ours was in March;)

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  9. I saw this yesterday but my reading was interrupted so I came back to say more or less ditto to everything above, and to say how much I enjoy looking back and finding such resemblance looks wise to the ones who preceded you.

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  10. Oh my goodness, do you look like your grandmother or what!!??

    You are an admirable and wise woman! And your family is beautiful!!

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