October 9, 2007

A Letter To A Friend





Icon Condos, 2007. (Snapfish is having system errors, so I am using an old picture or two until they are up again.)




Good morning dear friend.............

We have been awfully silent friends this year. Now I know you are very busier than your usual which is busy. Here I am back to my very happy, very part time retirement days again so am picking up my long lost communication skills. Even for a short email. I've learned the hard way that unless there is communication, there isn't friendship.

Of course, I am filled with questions. How are you? How is your art? Did you get my post with the link to that woman's magic collages? Are you working too hard as usual? Oh, lots of questions about you what you are doing, how work is going, how is he, how is his work is going, how S's is now that he's half grown. You know.........endless interest. I noted that when we stopped working together, our communications trickled away to nothingness. I am loathe to let our special friendship die.

Here the baseball season wound down with a last ten day homestand that burned us all out. There all we older folks stood for ten days wearing out in public while trying to keep our happy faces on. At the end when we lost, many of those of us who had been standing were ready to go home and stay there. We were all bone tired. None of us wanted to admit that not making it to the playoffs was a good thing.

And too, I had back pain the entire season this year. I did some soft muscle damage somehow before the season started, and I never got my back entirely back all year. There's no problem with my back here at home. None. But at work, that big stomach pulls my damaged back out and agony is my companion. Yes, mam, both G and I are Weight Watchering. We are both down two sizes, but you'd never know from looking at us. We are not doing so well while we have this cold either. Mea Culpa.

Blessings. My sobriety remains the biggest blessing in my life ever. I remain the most grateful person you know. Some of our friends with long term sobriety still fight tooth and nail for every inch of recovery. Once I got here and figured out how things worked, at about fourteen years, I didn't have the horror of a long struggle any more. Oh, I am still a drunk. I still think….which gets me in some awful difficulties. Sometimes I remain a laughable drunk. But you bet I am so very grateful that I am here today.

My eldest just had her 3rd birthday. Another bit of gratitude. My youngest isn’t doing so well. I use distance, prayer, and hope as the tools every day.

Vacation time is almost here. We were thinking of stopping up your way in November. My best friend from High School lives there, and you live up the track only a bit further. I don't know what time the train gets there........further research is needed, but G is getting one of those train passes where you can get on and get off again. Seeing you both. Seeing DA and her husband. Getting on again then going on up to Seattle.........see that city, see another old friend, and come home again. Take a week and just relax going up the coast and back down.

G has lived on the edge of "am I getting laid off/fired/let go" again this last six months as his company is on again off again with contracts. His company is really in two parts, and one part picks up a client, loses it, gains one, loses it.....ad infinitum. I know his stress levels have been high. I worry when he worries. What a pair we are.

Every day we go visit our friend Richard who is 81. He's the guy who 12 stepped me here........bless his soul. Every day we learn more about dementia that we didn't want to know. He has friends. He has friends who have come to his dinners and his parties for years and now none of them visit him. Only us. Two friends back east write. I'm forever grateful. So we go. We read his cards to him. We walk with him. We were taking him munchies, but he stopped eating all his regular meals. not good. I email his friends with email. I no longer call his friends who are still drinking….or went back to drinking. I need to call his friends who don’t have email. I take the responsibility…..for the moment.

Just today, life here is balanced. Maybe tomorrow it won't be, but today it is. I'm really grateful. I can't find your note to me telling me which dates were best. Are any best. Ya want a meal with an old lady in November?

Much love.........Maybe this is my journal entry. I so rarely write about feelings.......I'm content in the moment. Hugs to you............

Mage



Me: I shan’t tell you what cough drops do to me. It’s was a very embarrassing day at the library. But the work was flat out good for me….gee, for some reason I felt as if I had done this before.

G: Still with a common cold. Slowed way down.

Duck: Nice chat. He seemed very cheery. His roommate was awake and the curtains were pulled too.

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