October 11, 2012

A Stepfather

A young and dashing Bob, no date.

Bob Dowd was my mother’s third husband.  Frankly, I didn’t like him, and his children disliked him intensely.  I know only a little about his life, but I know my mother loved him.

Medic during World War II and Charter boat captain, he and my mother golfed and cruised together.  They were “drinking buddies,” as the Geezer called them.  He was gay, and his many friends were delightful.

The “Querida” and the “Megabob.”

He was mean to her.  In posting pictures to Ancestry.com, I've just now reached his pages.  I'm posting photos in as unbiased a manner as I can.  These are some of them.

No matter what happened or how I feel, he stuck with her to the end. 


  1. But he was gay??? Odd marriage!

  2. You never know what or why people are attracted to each other. He was a handsome man but I bet he knew that and used it.

  3. I have to wonder.....if he was gay, whether he treated her badly in part over his frustration at being in a marriage if he preferred to be with men. Not an excuse to treat someone badly, but it could explain some of it.
    Good for you in trying to maintain your objectivity.Sometimes we can understand things differently with adult eyes.

  4. If the relationship served them both on some level.....I guess it worked.

  5. One thing about leaving photos and information is not to hurt those who come later and want a polished version of what dear old granddad was like. Hard to do sometimes. I didn't like my children's father but have a lovely photo of the two of us taken at Twenty-nine Palms in 1959.


  6. My gaydar was working well, because when I saw the picture of him on the beach...

    I agree with Pat...she looked happy - and that's a good thing.


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Peter in front of a wall sculpture. We were invited up to Peter Knego’s home to see the latest installation.   Abstract flat ...