January 27, 2018

HOLDING MY HAND


One Christmas long ago.

We celebrated George’s birthday several weeks in a row.  With food.  Doesn’t everyone.  I tried to be circumspect about it, but G just lived with a certain abandonment. 

One week rib roast with Apple Brown Betty and a sparkler.  This week, first it was a shrimp in lemon, garlic, butter sauce…followed by deep friend ice cream.  He says it was good.  Today was a humongous breakfast of giant crispy French toast that the manager comped and G turned down.  He did have his discount coupon after all.  We ate a simple soup and salad dinner.

We debated going to see Poolie tonight.  Last night she was in tears saying she didn’t want to die.  She’s only two years older than George.  We did go to visit and found a long line of visitors from her old church.  They were kind and let us in then told us the news.

They told her she could go home with palliative care.  She was told also that the cancer would return.  If it did, her cancer doc told her, that any further treatment would kill her. 

Her constant companion and caretaker, Pam, understands at last.  Poolie doesn’t.  She doesn’t want palliative care.  We understand.  Accepting palliative care means she is going to die.   

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

  • Himself:  Got off work a little early, got a really superior Padre’s coat, and a marvelous antique Hawaiian shirt at my store.  Then we ate at Guadalajara last night.  He’s going to help me pin the quilt tomorrow.
  • Me, myself, and I:  Still eating soft foods.  He took me to Amvets today so I could look for sweaters.  I found three great T-shirts.
  • Reading:  ”Hell's Corner,”  Baldacci.
  • Gratitude’s:  That I have G to hold my hand.


6 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday many times over for George. But Poolie... Oh gosh... My heart is breaking for her.

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  2. Poor Poolie. It's a time that none of us look forward to.

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  3. Such a sad outcome for Poolie. She fought the hard fight for sure! I pray she finds peace of mind.

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  4. What a terribly sad time. I'm glad you had the joy of the birthday celebratons to lift your heart a little. I thoughts are with Poolie and I do hope she manages to find peace with her situation..but...you've got to admire someone who just won't give up, yes?

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  5. Accepting can be impossible. I told my mom, hospice is where the blankets are always warm. She didn't answer, went to sleep, and died the next day. At least we were taking care of her. I don't know the answer. I am so sad for Poolie.

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  6. George really knows how to milk a birthday. Way to go big guy. I am so sorry Poolie is feeling so depressed and will keep her in my prayers that she will defeat this yet.

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